....be careful not to be clumsy comforters who do more harm than good. Here are some tips
- Always acknowledge a loss.
- Give the mourner permission to grieve. Let them express their emotions freely. Allow them to talk about their loss. Listen.
- Offer practical forms of help and follow up for more than just the first week or month.
- Don't make careless statements like, "This was God's will" or "He is in a better place now" or "God only takes the best". Resist the urge to answer the WHY question.....and rather be supportive with your presence. "I'm sorry for your loss" is often all that needs to be said.
The conventional approach says that healing will come with time. but time will not heal your hurt. Only the Holy Spirit, who is the Comforter, will take away that pain. He puts the broken pieces of the human heart back together . It will take time and it is a process, but healing will not take place at random because of time passing.
Society says that we have to learn to live with bottled up regrets. The scripture say you must reconcile your regrets. Sometimes people die when they are at odds with others and this can leave long term scars. Romans 12:18 tells us to try and be at peace with all men, to let go of the past issues and forgive the person who hurt us.
Throughout the course of your life, you may lose your shelter, your fortune, your health or your spouse, but this you will never lose - Him, Jesus Christ. He has promised never to leave nor forsake us. If people or things are at the centre of your life - you are in a dangerous place, because when that is ripped from you, you lose your hope. When Christ is the centre, you can cope with the grief and get through the pain.
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